


You Are My Sunshine

by BetaHQ



Category: Free!
Genre: ALSO NAGISA IS AN IDIOT, Cuddles, Fluff, Fluff to the max, IN WHICH REI IS AN IDIOT, Kisses, M/M, Nightmares, Sleepovers, THEY ARE BOTH IDIOTS OKAY, and i gave her a name, because i could, btw she is evil, cameo appearance from a certain older sister, did i mention it was fluff, furthermore, i swear to all that is holy, i think i forgot to mention the fluff, these dorks will be the death of me, they are so canon i want to shoot myself out of a cannon, you'll find out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-14
Updated: 2014-08-14
Packaged: 2018-02-11 21:08:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2083185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BetaHQ/pseuds/BetaHQ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rei states that his family will be going away for the weekend. Nagisa invites himself over for a sleepover so Rei won't be alone. So he can take care of Rei. (insert fluff here) (insert fluff there) But then someone has a nightmare. And someone is missing when the other wakes up. (insert even more fluff right about here) (insert very stupid title reference here). </p>
<p>This was way way way longer than I had set it out to be I'm so sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are My Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chisakiichi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chisakiichi/gifts).



> THERE IS  
> THERE IS A FRIGGIN MIDGET DOG NEXT DOOR THAT WON'T SHUT THE FRICK UP  
> PLEASE STOP BARKING  
> CAN YOU PLEASE  
> I'M TRYING TO WRITE  
> ~~~~  
> anyway, gifted to the wonderful Gabbi-kouhai who is cool and stuff and *insert compliment here*  
> this is just an obligatory fic  
> it's not like I like you or anything  
> b-b-baka  
> ~~~~  
> this is so stupid  
> omg this is so stupid  
> I can't handle the fluff  
> there is so much freaking random shit my brain shoved into this that the summary pretty much only describes the end  
> Note that there is a very small amount of cursing, but I still feel like I should let you guys know in case that would leave an unsavory taste in your mouths

I just stared at Nagisa blankly. I had repeatedly told him not to come over, but true to his nature, Nagisa in turn repeatedly insisted that he did so. Although, I had to admit to myself that I'd been expecting the persistent little blonde to show up at any given minute. I sighed inwardly and berated myself. I should've never let that information leak during lunch on the roof yesterday. I could've had a peaceful weekend night. Relaxed. One where I, unlike most teens, would go to bed at a reasonable hour. Knowing Nagisa, it was practically set in stone that he would not let that happen.

I wanted to glare at Nagisa. Glare at him a mixture of confusion, annoyance, and a small amount of pissed. But looking at his face, I couldn't. His sweet little face. His eyes glinting with happiness. I wanted to wrap Nagisa in a hug. But, I had a preface of annoyance to keep up.

........Wait. Why do I want to hug him? Is it..... _is it because he looks so damn cute smiling while he stands there on my doorstep?_ ..... No. No, pfft, it can't be, I thought to myself, scoffing. Maybe I want to hug him because...... because he smells faintly of strawberries? That's more logical than me finding my best friend "attractive". Still, he does have this air about him that makes me want to always breathe him in.

_Wait WHAT?!?_ WHY WOULD I WANT TO BREATHE NAGISA IN. And why do brains always pick the most unexpected moments to say things like that? GAH WHAT'S HAPPENING?!? This is just Nagisa, the same one I saw yesterday. I couldn't have possibly felt this, whatever this is, yesterday. I would've remembered this feeling. I mentally slapped myself. _Get it together, Rei._

Looking from Nagisa's expecting eyes to the ground, I shuffled my feet a bit. I knew I was already defeated, knew that Nagisa would climb through a window to get in if he had to, but I figured that I'd stall the inevitable.

"Rei-chan, aren't you going to let me in? You don't wanna spend a Saturday night alone, do you?"

Ignore him and stall some more. I feigned interest on a pink and purple colored butterfly that frequently floated by my doorway from time to time as it landed on Nagisa's left shoulder. As Nagisa turned to look at it quizzically, I half-smiled. Which part of me felt like that was a mistake and part of me felt glad I did so because it caused Nagisa to giggle.

"Oh! Rei-chan, do you know this little guy?" Nagisa grinned, being careful not to move too much, lest the butterfly get scared of his intense nature.

"Sort of. Though there are many butterflies around here, it's pattern is unique and easily distinguishable so I recognize him as he flutters by from time to time." _I am also recognizing the fact that my heart is fluttering right now, but I won't tell you that because you can't know that because I don't even know what it means yet and you would just put some offhanded comment out there and things would get worse. And awkward._ Speaking of awkward...

*ahem* Very audibly clearing my throat to acquire Nagisa's attention, I stepped to the side and softly jerked my head towards the inside of my house, indicating that Nagisa could come in now. Nagisa brimmed with excitement. He exuded happiness. How is it possible for one person to shine so brightly? This doesn't even make sense, but I felt his shine seeping through my skin. The butterfly must've felt it too, or something to that effect, because it darted off of his shoulder. "Aww", Nagisa pouted, staring after the butterfly, "I wanted a picture of it." His shine dimmed.

Geez, I just can't handle sad Nagisa. I give up. "I, uh, I'm sure it'll come back?" Being unsure of what to say caused what was supposed to sound comforting to come out more like a question. But Nagisa must've taken delight in my screw up because he threw a dazzling smile in my direction and laughed while bouncing past me into my house. He left behind him the scent of strawberries and, like a bloodhound (very uncharacteristically like a bloodhound mind you), I trailed that smell all the way to to the kitchen.

Nagisa had thrown his bags down on the counter and was in the process of pulling on a ridiculously large chef's hat. "Nagisa. What are you doing?"

He looked at me half confused and half like I was an idiot, and, well, I suppose had that coming. "Rei-chan, what does it look like? I'm going to cook for you!! Duh!"

"Why?", I asked, because I honestly didn't know why Nagisa would cook for me. The minute I had seen him in my doorway I'd just planned to order pizza or something.

"You know, for a smart guy you can be a real idiot. Didn't I say I would take care of you?" Nagisa condescendingly shook a spatula at me. "Now go away. What I'm making you is a surprise~~" Nagisa singsonged the last word.

I really feel like I should at least help sort ingredients, do  _something_ to help. Now that he has given me the opportunity to relax, I can't. I started reaching for a bag, "B-Bu---" "AAHH! Uh uh, no butts Rei-chan! Not until you finish dinner." He devilishly winked in my direction and it scared me, sending chills down my spine. I knew he was trying his hardest to be unsettling, knew he meant it to sound like that. _Why does him talking about butts freak me out? And why am I so fucking on edge tonight? It's not like he's talking about my butt. Why would he be talking about my butt? It's not like there's anything special to lo_ \--

"Uh, Rei, you know I can hear you, right?" Nagisa looked as though he didn't know whether to blush or smirk so he settled for both.  _SHIT THOUGH SHIT I WAS TALKING OUT LOUD._   _HE HEARD ME TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT._  I waved one hand furiously in front of me to bat the awkward situation away and faked adjusting my glasses with the other to hide my growing blush. Sputtering and stammering, I made my way out of the kitchen "I, uh, um, uh, I, uhm, I think I'll just, uh, go wait in my, umm, room now?"

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Nagisa's laughter from 20 minutes ago when I ran out of the kitchen was still ringing through my ears. Ugh that whole scene was horrific. I had hoped to maybe read something while he was preparing dinner, but all I can seem to do right now is push my face further into my pillow and hope that never happened. Or at least that Nagisa would be gracious enough to never speak of that again. I lifted my head up to look at my clock. It's nearing 6:30pm. Tick tock, tick tock. I can't sit here with my face in a pillow the whole time. I need to do something. Hmmm, there really isn't anything better for me to do right now, so I'm sure Nagisa wouldn't mind if I took a little catnap..... zzzzzzzzzz

.....

I groggily awoke to Nagisa shaking my shoulder rather rapily. "REI-CHAN GET UP GET UP WAKE UP REI-CHAN!!" Nagisa's repeating shouts forced me to reluctantly open my eyes. And then those eyes widened with the realization that the sky was now dark and Nagisa now hovered on top of me. I jolted upright in surprise and immediately regretted doing so as the top of my head collided with Nagisa's chin.

"OW REI-CHAN!!"

"I'M SORRY"

"REI-CHAN WHY"

"I SAID SORRY"

Nagisa pulled off of me and I immediately wanted to pull him back, but I pushed that feeling down. I can't be thinking these thoughts, no matter how good he smells or how warm he is. He collapsed to the floor in an over-dramatic state, "Rei... Rei-chan the world is spinning." I rolled my eyes and rubbed the forming bump atop my head. "Rei-chan, my vision is fading and you don't even care." "Yes well, I'm pretty sure a hit to the chin wouldn't kill you", I retorted.

......

.................

"Nagisa?" I looked over at him, shocked he was actually keeping quiet for once. He wasn't making a peep, now laying there on my bedroom floor, playing dead. *tsk* "Nagisa, would you get up now please?"

......................

I sighed and rolled off of my bed, easing myself onto the floor. For all it's worth, this little son of a penguin is very convincing when he wants to be. Crawling over to him, I forced worry into my tone in hopes it would spark Nagisa to be done with this little charade. "Nagisa, are you alright?" I tried my hardest to sound like I wasn't annoyed. But when moments passed and Nagisa didn't stir, didn't even so much as twitch, genuine worry actually crept into my voice. "Uh Nagisa? Hey, are you really alright?" I tentatively reached out a hand to shake his shoulder. His head involuntarily lolled to the side as response to my movement. I could feel my face drain of color.  _Oh no what if this isn't an act what if i really did hurt him i mean i didn't think i'd hit him hard enough to hurt him and i definitely didn't hit him hard enough to kill him gods no but what if i hurt him how could i harm cute little nagisa with his perfect blonde hair that looks so soft and always falls in the right places and his cute little hands that would fit perfectly into mine and his short size that is still somehow the perfect height for me because i wouldn't mind having to pick him up to kiss me-- shit no stop thinking about how cute he is stop thinking about kissing him stop that not now not ever think about the necessary medical steps to proceed with what if he's in a coma what if i put him in a coma shit fuck dammit what if i put him in a coma._

I moved the side of my head over his face to check for breathing, turning so that I was directly above his slightly-parted mouth. I felt his hot breath on my cheek and ignored the redness that undoubtedly splayed across my face. "So he is breathing, good, okay, now t--" And then I was startled to silence by the fact that there wasn't just Nagisa's breath on my cheek anymore.  _There were his lips_ _._   _They shouldn't be allowed to be that soft._ I fought back that new side of me that's forming. The side that wants me to turn my head so that my lips can meet his. Instead, I pulled away quickly and opted to yell at him.

"N-Nagisa! What are you doing?!" My hands once again flew in front of my face as I was trying to hide my embarrassment. Nagisa looked mellow, looked quiet, like a kid who'd been caught doing something bad for the first time. "Rei-chan.... I'm sorry.... I just....", he trailed off.

"Wait. WAIT. Were you not even hurt?! NAGISA YOU IDIOT!!! I ALMOST CALLED AN AMBULANCE I WAS GETTING REALLY WORRIED!" Nagisa shrunk in on himself at my outburst, his brightness dimming again. I sighed and mentally punched myself. Shit I really hate sad Nagisa. "I'm sorry Nagisa, but I, I just don't understand why you would do _that."_ I put an emphasis on _that_ so it would have a double meaning that Nagisa would understand.

Nagisa blushed and fought himself for words, which made me blush because _why would he blush surely he didn't mean anything by it he just probably meant to say something and his lips accidentally brushed my cheek yea that's all it was_ "... Rei, I... It's just... you're uh", he stammered through his sentence ( _is my awkward rubbing off on him?)_  ,"... you're really cute when you're worried..." he spoke, trying his hardest to look me in the eye. But I couldn't look at him anymore. You know how when you're young, you were told not to look directly at the sun? Well this is like that, only 10x worse because Nagisa is 10x brighter than the sun and 10x cuter and  _for the love of christ i want to punch him and hug him at the same time._ But, I'm pretty sure he only said I was cute to get me to calm down, pretty sure all these awkward feelings are just in my head. Yet still, I can't look directly at him when he's this bright. I looked away from him, over to the side and noticed how long I had been napping. It's 9:30pm on the dot.  _wait a minute WAIT A MINUTE I SLEPT FOR THREE HOURS??_

I must've spoken my thoughts out loud again, because Nagisa emitted his trademark giggle. "Heh yeah. I didn't want to wake you, you looked nice and peaceful. Stupid Rei-chan is always so tense around me, it was nice for a change." Nagisa seemed to have regained his natural composure, for his smile was neither too dim nor too bright. A comfortable warmth. Followed by the, almost comical, simultaneous growl of both of our stomachs.  _oh shit yeah i forgot about that whole dinner thing._ "Oh, uh, sorry Nagisa, I guess the dinner you made is probably cold by now" I said while rubbing the back of my neck sheepishly. I flashed an apologetic look at Nagisa, him 5 feet away from me and mirroring my crossed legs to sit on the floor.

"Haha Rei-chan, you're so funny, didn't you think I'd make the food you like?"

"What"

"I made what you like of course. Sushi, right? You like sushi, did I remember that right? Hmmm, or was it strawberries?"

"Nagisa, you're the one who likes strawberries."

"Oh yeah."

"Anyway, what."

"What?"

"What's this about sushi?"

"Oh right. I made you lots and lots of sushi, Rei!! I came in to bring it to you but I saw you asleep so I went and put it in the fridge. Now that you're awake, we can eat it now!" Nagisa bounded up from his spot on my floor and danced out of the room, yelling for me to not follow because, in fact, he  _was_ supposed to be the one taking care of me. He twirled back in the room just a few moments later, balancing some plates and two tray-fulls of sushi, all the while wearing that stupid chef's hat again. I have to admit though, it's kinda growing on me.

Nagisa plopped the two trays down in the middle of the kotatsu that was in my room. Handing me a plate, he motioned for me to dig in, and the cheeky bastard had the nerve to scarf down half of a tray before I could even decide on what piece to grab first. *tsk* If he made it for me, I should get the first bite. Holding back mild irritation, I couldn't help but notice the way he eats in small bites, but in quick succession. The part of me that wanted to stab his eye out with a chopstick wrestled with the part of me that wanted to bend forward across the kotatsu and lick off the piece of rice stuck to his mouth. I ignored both parts and gave into my growing hunger, stealing sushi off Nagisa's tray to irritate him back. It didn't work though, as Nagisa was happily munching his homemade spicy tuna roll and humming a tune, oblivious to anything but his addictive bliss. I stared at the piece of sushi I picked up. It looked...... unique? Was that the word?

"Hey, uh, Nagisa?" I spoke up to get his attention. "Huh?" he asked through a mouthful of food, it very nearly spilling out of his mouth. "What... what is this thing?" I shook the  _whatever it was_  I had in my chopsticks to indicate that this was the thing. "OH! Oh that I almost forgot, that's a special sushi I made for you! Its name is 'The Rei-chan'. I put it on my tray because I was going to feed it to you."

"Wha- Nagisa, I am not a child therefore I do not need you to feed me it", I stated, maybe a tad too harshly. Nagisa frowned, but this wasn't a sad frown, this was a  _are you kidding me_ frown. "Rei-chan, whether you need me to or not doesn't matter. I want to feed it to you so I will. Besides, how many times do I have to remind you that I said I would take care of you?" I swore I could've heard Nagisa also mutter the word "stupid" under his breath, but I chose to ignore that. *sigh* I will never be able to stand up to that boy's quivering frown. And that irks me.

Reluctantly, I placed the odd sushi back on Nagisa's tray. "Alright then", I grumbled, "I guess you can feed it to me if it's that important to you." When Nagisa squealed with delight, I wasn't sure if i should be afraid or not. He picked up the sushi with his chopsticks in one hand and, leaning over the kotatsu, moved his other hand to the back of my neck to support my head, much like a mother would a baby. I would've shook his hand off if it hadn't been so pleasantly warm and  _goddammit why does his hand have to fit so perfectly against my neck._ The moment I regained my breathing was the moment he pressed the sushi up to my face and, encouraged on by a nod from Nagisa, I opened my mouth and let him place the entire piece there. (A/N that wasn't supposed to sound sexual ok I promise).

Nagisa released his hand from my neck  _too soon_ and was giving me one of his rare serious looks. It was expectant, probably waiting for an opinion on his original sushi. I chewed thoughtfully. I'm not sure what was actually inside, but I didn't want to offend by asking. It was admittedly kind of weird tasting on the first few chews, but once I mixed all the flavors together, it grew on me. The sushi was actually pretty tasty once I got used to it. "So, how did you like it?" Nagisa asked, cheerful at my approving expression.

"Well, truthfully, it was a bit off-putting at first, but once I got used to it, I enjoyed the sweetness mixed with the saltiness. It did grow on me after the first few bites, I actually really like it! Ah, just one thing though."

"Hmm? What iff it?" Nagisa sputtered through another mouthful of sushi, being that he had resumed eating after the word 'enjoyed'.

"Why did you name it after me?"

Nagisa rolled his eyes and swallowed the food in his mouth, "Rei-chan, it's so obvious. You must need new glasses if you are  _that_ blind."

 

~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

After dinner Nagisa insisted that we play video games up into the wee hours of the morning. But seeing as I had no game system, he settled for watching an all night horror movie marathon on the Spinechill channel.

And that's how I ended up on the couch in the sitting room, watching as the 3rd terror-filled movie faded to credits, with a dozing Nagisa leaning his head against my shoulder. My eyes were as large as planets at this point, less from the shock of the movie and more from the shock that Nagisa's cheek has been in contact with my shoulder for so long. His hair was tickling my neck wherever it touched. I tried to reach for the remote before the 4th movie started; it would presumably be about vampires as well, and Nagisa had been asleep since the 2nd movie anyway. I didn't see the point in continuing to watch. I didn't want to move my shoulders too much for fear of waking the adorable sleeping Nagisa, so I attempted to pick up the remote from the table with my feet. I almost had it, so close, but it slipped between my socked feet and flew across the room, bouncing against the wall. Score: 0 for humanity, 768492058 for remote controls.

I had no choice but to shake Nagisa awake for a few moments. Pushing him gently off of me, I shook him by the arms, and he responded with grogginess. "Ungh...... Reeeiiiiiii just let me sleeeeeep", Nagisa whined.  _NaGiSa'S sLeEpInG vOiCe OhMyGoD my heart cannot handle it my brain cannot function nagisa please stop being this cute ok it hurts my heart._  I shook my thoughts about cute Nagisa away, it was too late in the night to be thinking about that kind of stuff. Somehow, when he was tired he sounded impossibly even more like a cute little kid. "In a second, Nagisa", I pulled away from him and went across the room to put the remote back in it's place.

"Reeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnn come baaaaaack", Nagisa eyes were all squinty from sleep and he outsretched his arms in front of him, reaching for me.

"Nagisa, I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere."

"Promise?"

"Pro-- wha-- of course. Look at me, I'm standing right here."

"Hmph." He crossed his arms in front of his chest with a huff. Though, with Nagisa's attempt to to appear angry, it only made him that much cuter.  _Nagisa I thought I told you to stop being so cute goddam--_ "Carry me to bed Rei-chan", my thoughts suddenly interrupted by Nagisa's demand.

His straightforwardness shocked me so, and left me completely flustered as I hurriedly tried to protest "B-but-I-uh-I don't, I don't think-uhm, no?"

Another irritated huff of breath from Nagisa "Why not?"

"I, um, I don't know?"

"Then carry me."

And the look that Nagisa tossed in my direction melted my defenses, his expression an odd yet somehow sweet mixture of demanding and begging at the same time. So I pretty much gave up all logic, said "fuck it" as I walked back over to Nagisa, and yanked him up bridal style into my arms. For what it was worth, Nagisa had the decency to at least look the slightest bit surprised before he smirked and closed his eyes again. This little idiot was weakening my resolve. But, I was beginning to wonder why I even still held resolve as I smiled softly at his sleeping figure in my arms. I don't know what this fluttering in my chest means, much less what Nagisa's own feelings are.

_The goofball I was carrying probably just caught some weird sickness today and his emotions or hormones must be all over the place yea that's it just some weird sickness how else could someone so cute want to me to carry them and then snuggle up into my arms and chest as I hold them oh wait oh gods I forgot that he was making my heart flutter and his head is right next to where my heart is damn I think I really do like him because the fact that he's near my heart makes it beat louder shit I hope he can't feel the thud of my heart wait who am I kidding my heart probably set off some earthquake scale nearby shit I hope he thinks my thudding heart was caused by the movies yea ok good I think nagisa would believe that_ *snore*  _oh_ _wait hold on I forgot that nagisa fell back asleep nevermind but still I do think my heart is thumping too much it could wake nagisa up I should try to calm down uhh umm oh right I could try taking deep breaths_

I inhaled sharply and a strong whiff of strawberries coursed though me. How in the world does Nagisa manage to always smell like that? He smelled so fresh, like maybe I could actually taste strawberries if I just bit into h-- _no no stop right there_. My mental skid to a halt caused me to physically skid to a halt as well. I almost dropped Nagisa as I stumbled suddenly, but it was necessary to stop those thoughts from actually forming. Not now and  _especially not while he is asleep hmph we just need to get to bed it never took this long to get to my room before._

Finally arriving in front of my door I pushed it open with my foot and stepped in. I walked over to my bed and made to drop Nagisa onto it, but in the midst of walking through my room, I tripped on that stupid frickin chef's hat Nagisa left lying around. We both fell, but I twisted at the last second so that Nagisa landed on the cushion nearby. What just?-- And how? How is Nagisa still asleep? My elbow ached from where it made impact with the ground.  _Argh why would he leave that hat lying around anyway_. I looked to where Nagisa was still attached to my left side, ready to wake him up and give him a piece of my mind. But... as soon as I turned to look at Nagisa, the color once again drained from my face.

He looked like a shivering mess. When did this happen? He wasn't like this a few moments ago..... Wait a minute, this could just be another trick. Another trick to get me to care about him even more. Another ruse to give Nagisa a laugh or two. I rolled my eyes and scoffed, about to ignore him, but then I heard Nagisa starting to whimper in his sleep. "Very funny, Nagisa", I spoke unconvincingly as I pinched his nose closed. He coughed and sputtered so I let go and he resumed his shaky whimpers. _Oh no, what, what is, what's wrong, maybe, maybe he's having a nightmare?_ Is he having a nightmare? He was beginning to sweat buckets out of nowhere and he had his arms now wrapped around me in a vice-like grip, indicating his sleeping form wouldn't let me go anywhere. Maybe I should try waking him. Or at least get him off me enough so I could move. "Nagisa?", I tried shaking his shoulders again, but that didn't do a thing, and anyway I'm pretty sure you shouldn't violently shake someone who is in the middle of having a nightmare.

I rubbed my cheek, Oh, maybe I should do what he did. Maybe I should kiss his cheek and maybe the awkward feeling will shock him awake, or at least cause him to subconsciously roll away from me.  _It's definitely not because I want an excuse to kiss his cheek or anything ahahahahahaha of course not surely you jest._  I, um, I gulped and apologized to the sleeping Nagisa under my breath before I turned my head to the side and leaned in towards his cheek. Pressing my lips to the soft skin of his face, I could feel he was overheated. The instant my lips touched his cheek though, his whimpering quieted, but he forced his grip around me even tighter. I, slowly, pulled my lips from his cheek. _Ugh, now I can't really move anything._ The only thing I could really do right now was tickle Nagisa's side with my hand that was now stuck right there. I mean, I could try it, but I don't think that would-- and of course as soon as my fingers tickled his side, he cringed and moved away. _Why didn't I think of that before I kissed his cheek?? Well uh it's not like I don't want to kiss his cheek but-just-shouldn't he-shouldn't it mean something?_

_Anyway, how am I going to get him up nothing I did before worked. Maybe he'll just wake up on his own yea ok that'll work because I can't for the life of me get him to wake up umm but won't he need comforting or something when he wakes up? what would he find comforting? something he likes? ooh maybe I could give him a strawberry something oh shit wait there aren't any strawberries or strawberry flavored things in the house shit what do I do what do I do think rei think look at him he's shaking and sweating you need to get him something to make him feel better._

If this nightmare is as bad as it looks, then Nagisa really will need some comforting. *tsk* He is so lucky there's a little 24 hour dessert shop I know about, and that it's only a few blocks away.  That's all I'm willing to walk to at this time of night.  _But wouldn't you go to the moon and back for Nagisa?_ What?  _What? excuse me inner thoughts, this is no time for your shenanigans._

Through my thoughts, I could hear Nagisa talking in his sleep, his muffled whispers of "We still h-have a chance." Something about his scared little tone is scaring _me_ even more. I need to get into action, I need to go get the comfort food already.

First though, I stood up and walked over to Nagisa, scooping his shaking body up into my arms once again. I carried him over to my bed and set him there, tucking him in, thinking maybe he'd be more comfortable if he wasn't on the floor. Before leaving the room, I picked up that chefs hat. _Stupid thing._ I pit stopped in the kitchen to drop the hat on a counter before walking out of the house. Shutting the front door behind me, I silently prayed that Nagisa was alright. 

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Nagisa gasped and gaped for air as he woke up. Breathing heavy, he was thankful to be awake after his horror movie induced dreams. _That probably wasn't a good idea_ , he admitted to himself. He was about to turn to Rei to apologize for ever making that scary suggestion, especially since he'd fallen asleep on him. He didn't want to be taking advantage of Rei. But when he blinked his eyes and looked around, he noticed he wasn't in Rei's house anymore. He'd waken up in a tent. In a two person tent. Nagisa's senses finally working, he heard the rapid splatter of heavy rain against the tent cover. Sitting up, he could feel the movement of sand beneath where his body moved. "Woah, deja vu," Nagisa whispered.   
  
He feels like he's been here before. And then with a start he realizes that he has. This wasn't a good deja vu, it was bad. Bad bad bad. Nagisa's eyes widen in fear, in terror, and he begins to sweat. But the tent was slightly different than what it had been almost a year ago. Instead of Makoto's sleeping bag on the other side of the tent, he recognized it as Rei's purple one. He sighed with relief and shuffled over to cuddle Rei in the sleeping bag next to him.  
  
But as soon as Nagisa's arm touched the side of the bag, he was back to fear and sweating again. He didn't feel a body there. Rei wasn't there. Rei was gone.  _Rei was gone again._ If this was different than a year ago, where could Rei be? Panic panic panic _(at the disco) (no shut up this isn't time for references) (I'm sorry)_. Nagisa was trying not to panic but he couldn't help it. If this truly was a near image of last summer, then Rei would most likely be.....  
  
Frantic, Nagisa fumbled with the ever annoying tent zipper, doing his best to yank it open so he could stumble out. He didn't bother to go wake up Haru and Makoto, didn't even bother to check if they were still in their tent. He had to act fast, time was important. If Rei almost didn't make it last time, then he almost wouldn't make it this time, right? Nagisa ignored the fact that the rain was sure to soak the entire inside of the tent and dashed to the edge of the beach.  
  
Placing his hand above his eyes in a searching manner, Nagisa looked from one side of the water to the other. After going back and forth numerous times, his hand flopped back down to his side in a fit. The darkness of the night wasn't letting him see a thing, definitely not with the rain helping to cloud his vision. And although he tried to strain his ears to maybe hear a call for help from Rei, the crashing water and obscenely loud rain pounding the ground drowned out any other sound. Nagisa was about to give up his solo search and go run to wake up Haru and Makoto, when a flash of something caught his eye.  
  
He squinted his eyes in the direction it came from, and it happened again. Nagisa nearly fell into the water. That flash, it must've been Rei! That idiot always kept his glasses on. It's gotta be the moonlight reflecting off of them. Waiting for one last shine of light to be sure of Rei's direction, Nagisa dove into the water.  
  
After about five seconds, he knew the water was all-too-cold and all-too-fast and all-too-dangerous to be safe. And if Nagisa was having a hard time swimming and keeping his bearings in this monster, it made him feel even worse to think of how Rei was doing. Water was sloshing in his mouth and stomach, as waves crashed into him while he was trying to gulp for air. Fighting the waves only caused them to fight back against him. So, Nagisa figured he'd struggle with them instead of against them, letting them push him towards the direction where the reflections were coming from.   
  
It seemed to work, but Nagisa tried not to think of how long that took. He eventually wound up where he could see Rei in the water now, so he swam the rest of the way. Rei was freaked out, as all hell seemed to be breaking out in large waves around him. As he reached him, Nagisa tried to calm him down, but Rei's paddle board flipped away from his grasp as if cued by the waves. Rei was in terrible shape, coughing nonstop and flailing now that he had nothing to help him stay afloat. Nagisa tried his best to let Rei lean on him, and he noticed that his skin was ice cold. And as he struggled to swim back to shore, against the current, with Rei's body weight adding to his, he realized something. Even if they got back to shore safely, Nagisa wasn't sure what to do about Rei's chilling body temperature. He'd ask Rei (since he knows about these kinds of smart things), but his teeth Rei's teeth were chattering endlessly.

Something about the difficulty of the situation must've dawned on Rei as well, because he pushed Nagisa to stop moving forward. "W-Wh-What?" Nagisa struggled out through his own chattering teeth. Didn't they have to keep moving? But Rei silenced any more sound from Nagisa with a kiss to the cheek. He could've rejoiced in that surprise all day. The fact that Rei-chan, Rei, was finally giving him a kiss after all this time. Except his lips were all too cold, colder than he would've thought, and they were shivering, like he was choking back some sobs. He clutched Nagisa's arm for what he thought was dear life. When he pulled back, he didn't pull to far, his mouth hovering next to Nagisa's ear. His lips still shivered and and teeth still chattered, but determined to, he forced out his next words. "N-N-Na-Na-Nagisa I'm s-s-sorry. Th-thank you f-for trying to h-help me. I'm s-s-s-s-sorry okay. Y-you sh-should go. I'm j-just d-dead weight."  
  
 _What the hell?_ "What?!? R-Rei-chan I could n-never do that. We still h-have a chance. I'm h-here. I'm s-saving you, aren't I?" Nagisa tried to smile but he was pretty sure it came out looking more like a grimace. Nevertheless, Rei smiled back.   
  
Then with what had to have been the very last of his strength, he pushed Nagisa as hard as he could from him.  
  
"AH!! Rei, why would you?!"  
  
Nagisa, in his surprise, in his tears, in his desperation, tried to swim back but a wave pushed him further from Rei.  
  
Nagisa was now the frantic one again, flapping his arms unsuccessfully to try and get back to Rei, to knock some sense into him. _What did Rei think he was doing anyway? He was just floating on his back now. Wasn't he gonna swim back to shore?_    
  
Through the coldness and the crying, Nagisa spoke his next words as loud and as clear as he could. "R-Rei. Rei!! Don't be s-stupid! What are you--" But Nagisa choked on his words in response to the horror that happened right then.  
  
A large wave crashed over Rei, sinking him below the water.  
  
"NO!!!" Nagisa shouted. As he swam towards where Rei was, he tried to calm himself down. Rei had to come flailing back up for air any second. He needed air. It was human nature. So he had to.  
  
He had to, right?  
  
Moments passed.  
  
Right?  
  
"Rei-chan?" More moments passed, filled with the sound of heavier rain and faster waves.  
  
He was going to come back up for air, _right_?  
  
......................  
  
Wrong?  
  
Nagisa was hyperventilating now. Rei wasn't resurfacing. He couldn't see him anywhere. More cries began to tear through Nagisa. "REI!!!!" He couldn't believe this. He couldn't be losing Rei. Not Rei.  
  
His loud cries turned to quiet, broken sniffles. "Rei? Rei, aren't you out there?" _Where was Rei? Didn't he say he wasn't going to leave him? Or something like that? That he wasn't going anywhere?_ "Can't you hear me?" Nagisa had his hands clasped together now, his head bent down and his lips breaking the surface of the water with each movement.   
  
"I'm coming Rei, don't worry, I'm coming."  
  
A wave crashed over Nagisa as well. It tried to push him down.  
  
He let it.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

With a sharp gulp for air, Nagisa woke up, tangled in sheets. His face was wet from crying in his sleep. Scanning his environment, he thanked every power in the world that he was back in Rei's house. When he realized where exactly in Rei's room he was, he was surprised to say the least. The fact that he was in Rei's bed had Nagisa blushing, because he was sure when he fell asleep it hadn't been there. It was putting all sorts of thoughts into his head. Like what happened? Had Rei done something weird with him? That freak?  
  
Nagisa wanted to turn over and hug Rei, touch him, just look at him to make sure he was there. _There_ and _alive_ and _with him_ and _not drowning_. Except Rei wasn't there when Nagisa turned around. Nagisa was a bit worried but comforted himself with a, "no matter, he's probably just asleep on the floor."

But, as Nagisa stood up and paced the entire room, he saw that Rei wasn't anywhere else in the room either. Okay, now Nagisa was getting really worried.

_Breathe Nagisa, just breathe, stop hyperventilating, you're getting freaked out about nothing. He's probably asleep somewhere else or something. Rei wouldn't leave you. He had to be somewhere. He wouldn't be gone._

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Although it was raining pretty badly, I took my walk to the dessert shop slowly. There was this certain feeling that I had, a feeling you get when you take a walk in the middle of the night. I wanted to relish that feeling. A feeling like I could do anything. Even admit to myself that I like Nagisa. Like, _like like_ him. And I've been trying this whole time to figure out a logical explanation as to why. But there isn't one. Something so unstable as emotions are bound to be unpredictable. And, make you realize that you've actually felt these feelings for a while, they've just been dormant, you just haven't given them any thought. But weekends with Nagisa and night walks are the perfect time, it seems, for me to think about exactly that.  
  
And that same feeling I get when I take a walk in the middle of the night, and there's nothing but me and the stars in the sky. I get that feeling when I'm with Nagisa too. I feel like I can do anything when I'm with him. He makes insane things seem possible ( _like me getting me to swim for example_ ).   
  
He makes it seem possible for someone so bright as him to want to be around someone so helpless as me. Ugh, I was such an ass letting him in the house today too, maybe if I'd been smoother, he would've kissed me right then and there.  
  
 _Wait what what am I thinking? oh shut up you know you want to be thinking that. well I guess fine alright but I'm not sure it's okay to be thinking about nagisa kissing me like that I don't think it is especially not if he harbors no feelings in that way towards me because if he doesn't then it gives me no right and is unsettling to say the least anyway I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me like that though he's just been teasing me all day just been twisting my emotions around to make my heart melt and my brain explode because I have no idea what that idiots intentions are other than to get a laugh out of seeing me uncomfortable and damn who knew it would take me this long to figure out that nagisa was the root of all of my on-edge moments all of my trying to be better all of my shaky hands and dry throat because I thought that was some genetic thing wrong with me this whole time._  
  
But no, it's all Nagisa. That's all it's ever been since I met him. Maybe if it hadn't taken me this long to realize it, maybe if I knew it had been one of those 'love at first sight' type of things, maybe I could've researched something or other on the art of love. Maybe I could've made it impossible for Nagisa to not fall for me. _Maybe I wouldn't be landing on my ass falling for him if I knew what this feeling was sooner._  
  
But love is just as unpredictable as Nagisa, and though that is saying something, I don't think I would want to have either of those things any other way.  
  
I shivered a bit, I don't think I've ever put in serious thought about something like this. To be honest, it's scaring me. Thankfully, the wooden rustic-style sign of the dessert shop came into view. "Sweet Stars" it read, and I noted it in the back of my mind. I never really took notice to this place, but if Nagisa liked the cake, then I had to be sure to remember the name and get him something from here again. Signifying the end to my inner talk, I silently thanked the sign for being there to shut me up, and headed inside.  
  
As the glass door opened, it jingled the cluster of bells at it's top. The sound should have alerted my presence. There was one girl in the shop, whom I assumed was the sole worker at this time of night ( _morning?_ ). That girl, however, had fallen asleep next to the register. Her arms pillowed her head as the top half of her body was bent forward to rest on the glass counter containing the many cakes. Her light brown hair flared out around her head, resembling a fan.   
  
"I, uh, hello?" I tried to speak to get her attention but she was sound asleep. Clearing my throat, I moved up next to her by the counter. "Excuse me? Miss?" I spoke a bit louder this time, but it was no use, words weren't going to wake her. I tried to even tap her on the top of her head, but that was a lost cause as well. What else could I try? I didn't want to scare her awake. I could try to surprise her awake? How was I going to do that though? _Wait, maybe if it had worked on nagisa, it would work on her. well, possibly. but, I don't even know this girl, I don't think she would respond nicely if I tickled her. If I need to buy something from here though, I guess there's no choice._  
  
I tentatively reached my hand over her head, mouthing a silent apology, and tickled her neck. I was prepared for her to jump away, to cringe and brush my hand away, even to scream or something.

Not for her to throw a punch for my head as a reflex. Luckily, I jumped back in time.  
  
Getting over the shock of being nearly pummeled by a sleeping person, I was confused as to why she'd reflex like that. Well, at least she seems to be awake more or less. She's rubbing her eyes as she's backing away further from me, other hand still raised in a fist. "Hey, why were you sleeping on the counter, aren't you working? And I must say, for someone who's asleep, you've got a fast arm."  
  
She opened the eye she wasn't rubbing, and I saw her eye color was a pink. It was almost like Nagisa's, but just a shade paler. Finally speaking up, her voice was crackly and uneven, "Oh I heard you. I was awake. I just thought if I ignored you that you'd go away. But then you tried to feel me up so--"  
  
"NO! No no no that's not, I was just, I was trying to wake you up. Believe me, I have no interest in you."  
  
Her fist raised up higher and her eyes narrowed at me, but I wasn't sure if the look she was giving me was offense or disbelief.  
  
"Hey, I've got someone I like anyway." _What the hell did I just say that why would I say that I don't know her she doesn't know me I don't even know if nagisa feels something for me so why would I tell a random person that._  
  
She lowered her fist and took her other hand from her eye. Then those eyes widened in what appeared to be recognition and she bounded forward, back up next to the glass case. "Hey I think I know you! Or about you at least." Her voice was now clear from being fully aware that she had to converse with somebody. "Aren't you Nagisa's friend from that swim club he's always going on about? You must be. You know, he describes you guys in depth, like _very_ detailed. You've gotta be Rei, right? Yeah, Rei, that's it, tall guy with glasses, so smart he's stupid but 'that's what makes him cute'"  
  
"What?"   
  
"Don't look at me, those are Nagisa's words." She held her hands up defensively.  
  
 _Wait what nagisa said I was cute nagisa told someone else that I'm cute did he mean it that time omg nagisa thinks I'm cute omgomgomg I think I want to cry no wait I want to throw up I'm probably gonna do both if I don't continue on this conversation anyway besides that who is this girl how does she know nagisa is this one of those 'small world' things?_  
  
"Um excuse me miss, but who are you?" I asked her.  
  
And apparently that was the wrong thing to ask her because she picked up a cake knife and pointed it at me, the sharp point of it's tip touching my nose. "Don't. Call. Me. Miss. That is what you call ladies, I am not a lady am I? No, no I am not. I am young. So if you call me miss again, you just might be _'miss'ing_ a few pieces from your face."  
  
I gulped in terror. For a sweets shop worker, this girl was surprisingly deathly. "I, uh, I'm sorry? I won't call you that? But could you please put the knife down?" After a pointed look, she lowered the knife. "But if you would be so kind as to tell me who you are, I could call you that."  
  
With a 'humph', she folded her arms and gave me a tight smirk. "I am the one, the only, eldest older sister to Nagisa, Hazuki Haizu! Has Nagisa never talked about his darling sisters?"  
  
"Well, uh, I guess he has... but it's less names and appearance, more 'listen to what they did this time they are so mean' sort of thing."  
  
"Ah yes. That does sound like what he would talk about. A shame he could never get that marker off his face before picture day at school. He wouldn't shut up about how much he hated us for that." Haizu took a long look at me. Was she trying to calculate me? It was weird, like I could almost see what she was wondering about me. Wondering what my relationship with Nagisa was.  
  
After some moments of awkward silence, she spoke up. "What are you here for though? Aren't you supposed to be with Nagisa? He said he was sleeping at your place tonight."  
  
 _Ah shit_ I nearly forgot about the whole reason I came into this shop. "Oh yes, yes he is. He's back at my place. I, um, I came to get cake. Strawberry shortcake. At 4 in the morning."  
  
"For what?"  
  
 _Ah crap._ "For... uh... for..."  
  
Haizu locked her hands together and leaned on them, elbows on the counter. "Lemme guess, for him, huh?" Her eyes pierced right through me as she gave me a knowing smirk. A smirk that seemed to know more than I did about this situation.  
  
I couldn't help but scratch the back of my neck, this scenario was so uncomfortable. "Uhm... well... yes. But it's not anything weird like that. He just, he was having a nightmare so I thought I'd cheer him up with something."  
  
"Mhmm sure okay. Whatever you say, you're the customer. Strawberry shortcake, was it, I'm going to assume two slices? Or were you both going to share one?" I made a face, of which Haizu looked as if she wanted to burst out laughing but held it in for the sake of human decency. I truly didn't know she was capable of decency. I was so shocked at the thought of sharing any sort of food with Nagisa, but the fact that she suggested sharing cake... I wanted to smile and die at the same time.  
  
"I'll, uh, take two. We won't be sharing, I'm pretty sure."  
  
Haizu pouted a bit. "Aww poor Nagisa, I'm sure he would've wanted to share with you," she teased while reaching for the slices of cake to put into a take-home box. "Here I thought you liked Nagisa or something."  
  
"WHA-WHAT?!? Ha. Hahahahaha of course not. What ever would give you that impression? Ha preposterous, someone like me liking someone like him. A guy for one, and someone with his personality. And vice versa. Surely you jest." I hope my laughter and rather quick reply didn't give way to my rather terrible attempt at a lie.  
  
Haizu shrugged her shoulders. "You can't blame me for assuming. You did walk out here in the pouring rain at 4 in the morning just to get some cake for Nagisa. I thought it was pretty cute, something you'd do for someone you like. After all, you _did_ say you had someone you liked."  
  
"I did?"   
  
"You did. Mind telling me who that is now?" She held the box containing the cake behind her back. "You don't get this unless you tell me~~"  
  
Nagisa was right. His sister is demonically evil.  
  
I could feel my face blotching up with redness from embarrassment. I could feel my heart start to thump and my knees going weak. _If it was going to be this hard to tell Haizu this, then how could I ever hope to tell Nagisa? I just have to say it. Just say it. Just--_ "NAGISA OKAY? IT'S NAGISA I LIKE NAGISA ARE YOU HAPPY?!"  
  
Haizu looked shocked at my loudness for a second it seemed, but then she just flashed me another knowing smirk. "Well you didn't have to shout." She tossed me the cake, I fumbled but caught it, and she was seemingly satisfied with my answer. I dropped the money for the cake on the counter and was about to make a run for it out of the dessert shop, away from this hell of a situation. Except when I got to the door, at that exact moment, thunder boomed. The rain got impossibly heavier, cascading in waves down from the sky.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

Nagisa had combed through the entire house, searching for Rei while sobbing. All the while, the heavy rain was reminding him of his nightmare more and more each second. Even though Nagisa was trying his best to push that to the back of his mind, it kept popping back up, causing him to hyperventilate. Nagisa finished checking the room that must've been Rei's parents', and was about to just give up and flop to the ground in a puddle. But a lightbulb flicked on inside his brain and he realized he did check every room, every room except the kitchen. It dawned on him that Rei might've went for a nighttime snack and maybe he was listening to music or something and maybe he just hadn't heard Nagisa stumbling around the house. Filled with this newfound hope, he dashed into the kitchen, only to find Rei not there. The chefs hat was on the table, but Nagisa was sure he'd left it in Rei's room. Had Rei put it back there?   
  
And at this time, Nagisa was filled with something, a feeling that made him lean over the kitchen sink and explode into tears.

_Rei was nowhere. He left. Was he even coming back? Where was he? Was this the nightmare all over again? Was Nagisa just stuck, unable to help Rei? Was Rei out there somewhere, drowning?_  
  
As Nagisa was crying for Rei to come back, something floating outside by the kitchen window caught his eye, even in the darkness. He looked up, wiping his face with the back of his hand. It was the butterfly he'd seen in front of Rei's house today. How it was even able to fly about in this horrid rain was beyond Nagisa. But, something about seeing it had him bursting into another fit of tears. Somehow it looked concerned for him. It was the one of the most farfetched things Nagisa ever thought of, but, maybe it would help him?  
  
Nagisa tried to calm his hiccuping sobs enough for the butterfly to be able to hear him clearly, and he tried not to think about how stupid that was. "Um," *sniff*, "uh," *hic*, "hey, um, butterfly. Could you maybe help me get Rei back possibly? God this sounds crazy." The butterfly fluttered it's wings as if agreeing with him but willing to listen. How is it that Nagisa could read the emotions of a butterfly so well, but never had he been able to do so with Rei? He shook his head, the butterfly seemed willing to do something, so.... "Uh, okay butterfly. Could you go find Rei and let him know I need him right now? And if he's not alright like if he's hurt or something just float back and flutter some worried emotion at me." Again, Nagisa tried not to think of how this whole scenario would sound to anyone sane. The butterfly flapped it's wings once, as of saying " _Got it, I'll be right back_ ," and it flew off, leaving Nagisa to cry some more. "Rei-chan come back," he kept repeating.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

I was going to ignore safety precautions and dash out anyway, but Haizu jumped up behind me and grabbed my shoulder. "Uh uh uh Rei-chan. Didn't you just hear that storm get worse right this second? You can't be going out in that weather." Part of me thought the flaring up of the storm was her doing, but the other part knew that it was scientifically impossible for a person to change the weather. Still, this was evil demon girl.  
  
"But I have to--"  
  
"Nope, nuh uh, no buts, you'll have to stay in here until the storm lets up. Nagisa wouldn't like it of something happened to you out there in that storm."  
  
I rolled this thought around in my mind. Ugh she had a point. Me and stormy nights don't exactly mix. Maybe I should just stay here for a while...  
  
And I was about to tell her that when a flash of color sticking out in the darkness caught my eye. It was outside the front door, hovering just behind the glass. Upon squinting my eyes, I recognized the little colorful thing with wings. It was the butterfly that landed on Nagisa this morning. What was it doing here? How'd it even get here in the rain? The butterfly landed in the door's handle and fluttered it's wings as if to say " _does it matter how I flew in rain? there is something more urgent._ "   
  
What? WHAT?!?! _Was I going crazy or was this butterfly really communicating with me? how was it even doing that? how could I know what it meant to express just by a flutter of it's wings?_  
  
"Uhh hello," Haizu spoke up, waving her hand in front of my face, "earth to Ryuugazaki-kun, why are you staring at the door? You're not still thinking about going out in this weather, are you?"  
  
The butterfly flapped it's wings three times, giving me the impression that it meant " _you need to. you have to get back home. right now._ "  
  
"The butterfly's right," I said aloud, without thinking.  
  
Haizu looked stupified. "What?"  
  
"Oh, um, I mean, I really do need to get back though...." As I trailed off I received a particularly cold look from Haizu. "I just, I need to get some sleep in tonight..."  
  
"Mhmm sure, some sleep in with Nagisa."  
  
"WHA-W-w-would you stop implying those things I assure you that is not what my reasons for needing to get home are!" Was the whole Hazuki family like this? Were they set out to destroy me and my innocence?  
  
Haizu's poker face was terrible. She tried to keep from smiling but burst into laughter straight away at my hurried response and reddened face. I can see why Nagisa dislikes his sisters now. _Eeeevviiiilllllll._  
  
"Haha I'm just teasing Ryuugazaki, no need to get so defensive. _Unless_ you have something to hide and you really _are_ planning to sleep with--"  
  
"NO!!"  
  
Another fit of laughter, this time she laughed so hard she had to wipe tears from her eyes. The butterfly flapped it's wings hurriedly, seeming impatient.   
  
"Aha, sorry Ryuugazaki, Nagisa was right, you are so much fun to tease."  
  
"All right, okay thank you, that aside, I need to get going, so if you'll excuse me." I tried to hide my angry face as I nodded my head. Turning to leave, I was once again stopped by Haizu's hand.  
  
"Hey, shouldn't you at least wait til the rain lets up? Just a little? Just so I can tease you some more?" She smirked at me.  
  
I looked out at the sky. "The rain has let up. So, if you'll excuse me--"  
  
"AH! No no Ryuugazaki-kun, at least take an umbrella with you." She dashed to the back of the shop and yanked an umbrella out of what I assumed to be her bag. She bounced back up to me, holding the yellow umbrella out.  
  
I fumbled with her sudden change in attitude ( _I'm guessing Nagisa is more like his sisters than he realizes_ ). "Oh, um, thanks I guess," I said as I reached for the umbrella.  
  
Haizu held the umbrella back out of my reach now ( _of course_ ) and looked at me in the eyes. "Hmph, approved."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Approved."  
  
"Again, what?"  
  
She sighed, "You are approved. You know, to date Nagisa. Well approved by me at least. Go get 'em tiger." She winked at me.  
  
What. _What was. did she just give me her blessing? it's not like she's nagisa father. should I thank her? it would be the right thing to do I guess..._ "Um, thank you?"  
  
"Mhmm, no problem, you'd be great with Nagisa," she said genuinely while handing me the umbrella. Just as I took it from her hands, she spoke again, "Just don't hurt Nagisa. Because I watch criminal shows. And I have knives. So I can skin the flesh off of your bones and make it look like an accident." Haizu said this with a low voice and a scary sense of 'she means it'.  
  
"I'll, uh, I'll try not to."  
  
She nodded at me once and waved bye. I waved back and turned again to open the door. Finally leaving, with one foot outside and me trying to open my umbrella, Haizu spoke up again.  
  
"Don't forget. Don't hurt Nagisa."  
  
"You said that already."  
  
"Yes, but I thought I should say it twice."  
  
"Why?"  
  
She gave another smirk here. "Oh, you know. Because it can be taken one of two ways. _If you know what I mean~~_ "

 

~~~~~~~~

 

"Nagisa? Nagisa, where are you?" I was finally back inside the house. I flew out of the dessert shop, and dashed home. As quick as I could. I didn't want Haizu following me, as I'm pretty sure she'd do something like that. But when I stepped in my room, Nagisa wasn't on my bed where I had left him. "Nagisa?" _oh shit oh shit oh shit what happened did something happen to him did he wake up and freak out and run out of the house to try and find me did something happen to him did he go outside looking for me did he slip and fall and get hurt oh my god oh shit is he hurt fuck damn what if he got hit by a car or something crap I shouldn't have left him alone._  
  
I spun around to go check for Nagisa, and almost crashed into him in the flesh. "HOLY. Geez Nagisa, goodness you scared me. You had me worried for a second. I was beginning to think something bad might've happened to you." I was trying to smile to lighten the mood, but that was slapped off my face with a loud *smack* of Nagisa's hand. "HEY OW WHY'D YOU DO THAT?" I cried out.  
  
I stopped short at Nagisa's glare, my blood running cold. His eyes were puffy like he had been crying for a while, and tears were still streaming down his face. That didn't stop him from looking capable of murdering me though. He spoke shakily, through clenched teeth, "Why? You want to know why I'd hit you? How about you tell me, huh? How about you tell me why you would leave."  
  
Shitshitshit I didn't think he'd wake up while I was gone though, "Hey, Nagisa, I was just--"  
  
"SHUTUP REI GOD JUST SHUTUP!!" His eyes flared so much I think he burned a whole straight through me. The hand that had smacked me was flying about in a frenzy, accentuating his shouts. Resuming his shaking, angry words, "Do you have any idea how scared I was. You said you were right there, you said you weren't going anywhere. And then I had a nightmare that something happened to you and I woke up and you were gone. I thought something really did happen to you, you big dumb jer--"  
  
I stepped forward and wrapped him in the tightest hug I possibly could, cutting him off. He tried pushing away from me, weakly beating his fists against my chest, but I wouldn't let him go. "Nagisa, Nagisa please calm down for just a sec. I'm sorry okay. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. Don't cry. Stop crying. I wasn't trying to be a big dumb jerk. I didn't leave to hurt you or anything, I was trying to get something to help, okay? Hear me out." He stopped fighting to get out of my grasp, but he kept the anger in his eyes. "I noticed you were having a nightmare so I thought you might need some comforting when you woke up. I didn't know how to comfort you besides strawberries but there aren't any in the house so I wanted to go get you some strawberry shortcake. At 4 in the morning." I shook the bag I was holding and for the first time, Nagisa stopped glaring at me and noticed it.  
  
He seemed to finally calm down, blinking at the bag with his cake in it. He looked back up and shot me another glare, not so much murderous this time as it was cute. Giving me a final weak punch on the shoulder, he pouted and whispered something so soft I'm not sure if I heard him right. "Idiot. I don't need strawberries to comfort me. I just need you."

 

~~~~~~~~

 

While we ate the cake, Nagisa calmed down a lot. He'd stopped giving me angry looks and he wasn't sobbing anymore. He said he wanted to tell me about the dream and I was scared it was going to make him cry again, but if he really wanted to there was no stopping him.  
  
Nagisa was trying his best not to blush at this next part. "And then you, uh, you, urm, you, you, you, youkissedmeonthecheek", and although he stumbled his words together, I could hear them perfectly clear. "But I couldn't save you..."  
  
"Wait you umm, you felt that in your sleep?" Nagisa gave me one of his cute little confused looks and SHIT DAMMIT I LET IT SLIP AH HELL   
  
"Huh? What do you mean, Rei-chan? Felt what?"  
  
"I, uh, I, umm....."  
  
"Oh, did you do something to me?" Nagisa shot me this sly look, leaving me to question his innocence. "Something to me in my sleep?"  
  
And now I was flustered again. Wait no, beyond flustered. I must've been so red it looked like I dumped my face in a tub of ketchup. I was sputtering everywhere, my hands now covered my face to try and hide myself from this situation, and even worse, every. single. time. that adorable idiot's eyes caught mine, I squeaked. _Yes ladies and gentlemen, someone out there is so cute and unsettling it's causing Ryuugazaki Rei to squeak. If this is what love is like, I want no part in--_  
  
"Mm Rei-chan is a pervert~"  
  
My hands flew from my face, "WHA-hah I am no such thing. How could you call me that?"  
  
"You saw my vulnerable, unconscious body and swooped in, Rei-chan, that's all the reasoning I need. Surely your scientifical brain understands reasoning, hmm?" He said the last part while tapping his head.  
  
I adjusted my glasses, "Well yes but that wasn't why...."  
  
For some reason I didn't quite understand, Nagisa visibly saddened. "Well then why, huh? Why? Why why why? Why would you do that to me in my sleep, Rei-chan? So unfair..."  
  
Huh? Unfair? "B-but I--"  
  
"UNFAIR. UNFAIR REI. I kissed you on your stupid friggin cheek when you were awake because I wanted to see your reaction. Didn't you want to see me react?"  
  
I don't understand. He meant to do that? Who'd want to kiss me on the cheek. "Wait, you made that whole scene earlier today just so you could kiss me on the cheek?"  
  
"OF COURSE YOU FOUR-EYED REALLY CUTE IDIOT. DON'T YOU GET IT AT ALL?!?" Now Nagisa, too, was blushing intensely, his hands were a flailing mess. Although his harsh tone, I couldn't help but notice he called me cute..... again.... "Rei you're so frustrating. Why would you do that to me when I was asleep? So you can make fun of me? Do you not like me? Not even a little bit? Unfair, Rei, so unfair, because I like you a lot. There okay? I said it. I like you Rei. I like you because even though you're really smart, you're also really stupid. Because you always, always, put others before yourself. You're always so helpful. And you're such a goofball sometimes but you don't even realize it. You put up with me. You make me smile a lot, Rei. So I like you. Like way more than a friend. Way more than a best friend. And you don't even like me a teensy bit. Not even enough to kiss my cheek when I'm awake. You're terrible, Rei. How could you make me feel so happy but not even know that you're doing it? How could you make me feel these things and not feel them too? Unfair, Rei. So unfair." Was...... was Nagisa's voice breaking? Was he starting to cry? Shit, did I do that? "Unfair. Unfair unfair unfair unfair unfair unf--"  
  
And before I knew what I was doing, I launched forward, taking Nagisa's face in my hands, mashing my lips against his. I was kissing him. I was kissing him and it didn't matter to me if he kissed back or not. He was stunned, for maybe the first two seconds. But once he got over the surprise, he started moving his mouth against my own. He was kissing me back. He was kissing me back! As I grinned into the kiss, so did he. _I need Nagisa._ And I think he needs me too? Not sure, but what does it matter, I'm kissing him and it's the best thing. _The best feeling ever._ My lips were on his and his lips were on mine. My hands were cupping his soft face and his hands were resting on my shoulders. My heart was jumping up into my throat and my brain was melting from his comfortable heat. His lips were so warm. Softer than I'd thought they'd be. But not that soft right now, because it was a hungry kiss. I felt kind of embarrassed by it, but I didn't register that in the moment, couldn't register much of anything. Except for the feel of Nagisa's lips on mine and the way his hands grabbed my shoulders to push me closer to him. His lips tasted of strawberries (of course) and a little bit of something else but I couldn't tell what that something else was because the only thing I was thinking about was that we were kissing. We were finally kissing.

Then, after what seemed like a blissful eternity, we pulled apart so we could breathe. Cold, bothersome air separated our faces, but his face was still in my hands. I didn't want to let him go. Not yet. Not _ever_.  
  
Then Nagisa's face turned from smiling to shocked as he realized what just happened. That we just kissed. Ah, oh no, was that not what I should've done?  
  
"Please don't cry, okay? Please stop being sad because I can't take it when you're sad. I can't handle it, okay?" I smiled to try and relax him.  
  
But Nagisa just stared at me with shocked, wide eyes. So, I took that as an opportunity to give light to what I had been suppressing this whole day (scratch that, ever since I'd known him).  
  
"Nagisa listen to me. You're the one that's an idiot. You're the stupid one. Well, I guess maybe me too because I never really thought of this until today, but that's not the point. Point is, I like you too Nagisa. Don't be an idiot. Who couldn't like you? I adore you. You're so perfect for me in every way and too cute and so, so, so you that it kills me. It makes my heart ache sometimes. You make me feel things no one else can. You're bright and bubbly and you're wonderfully stubborn and adorably persistent and a tad annoying at times but thats you and you make everything around you happy. You make the world better, Nagisa. And you make it something like an apocalypse when you're sad. In my world anyway. So please don't be sad okay because I like you too, got that? I like you too."  
  
The silence that followed was tangible with awkwardness. We were just looking and each other, reading each other for truth. And I guess Nagisa finally finally believed my feelings for him, because he broke his face from my hands and tackled me to the floor in a hug. He was so warm it was paralyzing. His head nuzzling into my chest was both giving me life and killing me at the same time. "Rei, Rei-chan, I'm so happy... okay I won't be sad anymore I promise. Cross my heart. Because it's yours now." He looked up and gave me this blinding smile. Too bright, too bright, I'm gonna, I'm gonna kiss that idiot again.  
  
I leaned down and kissed him again. Just a quick peck though. If it was anymore than that, I'd explode from happiness. And I don't need to be exploding. There was also the matter of actually getting some sleep tonight as well. But as I pulled away, I knew for a fact I heard Nagisa mutter, "Tease." _I swear, this guy._

 

~~~~~~~~

 

We were laying on my bed side to side, arms looped together and fingers still intertwined. It was dark in my room, save for the little penguin nightlight Nagisa had brought with him. It shone just enough so that I could see him, could see how he was hugging close to me. Nagisa wouldn't let me go. And I wouldn't want him to. I yawned happily as I reached over Nagisa to place my glasses on the nightstand. Settling back into my place against the wall, I tugged him closer so that his head was resting on my shoulder. This, this was finally peace. Albeit at 3:30am but still, Rei felt as if he could drift into a very easy sleep, with Nagisa's scent enveloping him.

"Rei..... I can't fall asleep yet."

I blinked my eyes back open and looked at Nagisa's face, only a few inches from mine. Man, he really shouldn't be able to make me blush this hard. How can I still be so flustered when we just cleared up our feelings for each other. "Oh, uhm, do you want me to sing you a lullaby then?" I asked Nagisa, whose hand chose that moment to release mine and snake up, holding the side of my face.

"Nope. I wanna sing  _you_  a lullaby" He informed me.

"Oh, uh, but I thought you were the one who just had a nightmare, wouldn't you want me to sing one to you?"

Nagisa curled even further into my side and smiled up at me. I sighed happily,  _I could get used to his warmth._ He shook his blonde bob from side-to-side "Uh-uh, this is a special lullaby for you." I returned his smile and leaned down to plant a kiss atop his head.

"Well, I can't very well refuse you then." I leaned back from his head.

"Good", Nagisa moved his other hand up to hold the other side of my face so that our eyes were staring into one-another's. As he tightened his grip to the sides of my head, I half-snorted, "I'm not going anywhere." What happened was the opposite of what I wanted to happen, Nagisa frowning.

"You said that before too, but then you had left", he tightened his grip even further on my the sides of my head.

"O-ouch, Nagisa, I thought I said I was sorry. And please loosen your grip just a bit, you're kind of squishing my face"

Now Nagisa smiled again, "I know", he said before giving one final smush of my cheek. He loosened his grip but held steadfastly to me, to make  _sure_  that his perfect pink eyes were boring into my purple ones. And all he did was stare at me for the next few awkward moments.  _ugh oh no I feel the ramblings coming on I'm gonna word vomit soon if he doesn't get on wit--_

"Ready for my lullaby?" Nagisa asked softly.

I nodded, my face becoming unbearably red again.

"Mm ok", Nagisa cleared his throat once, then began.

 

"You are my Rei-chan

My only Rei-chan

You makes me happy

When skies are gray

You'll never know, Rei

How much  _I love you_

So please don't take my Rei-chan away"

 

Nagisa finished, looking pretty embarrassed, his sweet pink blush blooming when he said the words  _I love you_. I couldn't help letting a happy smile go in his direction.

"I, uh, I know, that was um, pretty stupid, right? Ahahahahaha let's just forget that and go to bed now, okay?" Nagisa flipped onto his back so that he was staring at the ceiling.  _Aww Nagisa got flustered he's so damn cute like this too why is it that everything he does is_ _so cute._  I couldn't help what I did next.

I threw my arms around Nagisa and wrapped him in a hug, pulling him closer to me. "Ah! Rei-chan! What are you do--" "I love you too, Nagisa."

Nagisa looked shocked at first (I don't know why, it'd be impossible not to love this boy), then simmered down into a state of happiness. He spoke for me to look at him "...... Rei", so I lifted my head just in time for Nagisa's lips to slip onto mine. It was like before, but sweeter, not as desperate, and there was the taste of cake that now added to his strawberry flavor. So that's what that something else was. This time our lips melded together in perfect harmony. Not sloppy, like before.  _So... tasty...... need... more._  I ran my tongue against his bottom lip (that's what you were supposed to do, right?) and tried to push my tongue past his lips, into his mouth, but Nagisa just smirked and pulled away, leaving my throat to emit an embarrassing whine. "See, you are a pervert. Uh-uh-uh Rei-chan, you have to take me on a date first~~" _  
_

Nagisa must've rubbed off on me or something because it was I who pouted this time. "Now c'mon Rei-chan, don't you make that face. Don't you think its time for sleep, anyway?"

I thought through this and reluctantly nodded my head as Nagisa pulled me in to cuddle him. He wrapped one arm around me and reached his other up so he could tangle his fingers in my hair. I nuzzled into his shoulder.

"Hey Nagisa?"

"Hmm?"

"You know...."

"Know what?"

"You're my sunshine too."

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> SPECIAL THANKS TO THE DOG THAT FINALLY SHUT THE FRICK UP  
> ~~~~  
> yea, so this my first fic ok I'm crying I'm finally done with this monster  
> constructive criticism is appreciated I guess
> 
> but guys
> 
> do you understand
> 
> hoW HARD IT IS TO COME UP WITH A TITLE
> 
> I WAS CONTEMPLATING JUST BUTTONMASHING AND TITLING IT SOMETHING LIKE HVCDHVUIGERUAVGDFAHBVUYD
> 
> but no
> 
> apparently there's this thing called 'comprehension' that people need
> 
> I don't think I have it
> 
> don't even get me started on the summary  
> ~~~~  
> also special thanks to honey roasted peanuts, slim jim's, and coca cola, because that's pretty much what fueled me to write this.  
> ~~~~  
> flustered Rei is the most adorable thing and sad Nagisa makes me cry the entire atlantic ocean ok but this was fun to write and I feel accomplished  
> ~~~~  
> AND I ALMOST FORGOT THE WHOLE CONNECTION TO THE TITLE AT THE END SO HELP ME GOD


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